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Coping with a Crush

Author: Beth Morrisey MLIS - Updated: 25 November 2010 | Comment
 
Crush crushes crushing relationships

Like their first kiss and their first love, most people can remember any number of details about their first real "crush." The butterflies in their stomachs, the dry mouths, the sweaty palms, the racing hearts - it may all sound gross, but these symptoms are exhilarating when you get to pair up with your crush for a science experiment, sit next to your crush on the bus or (the crème de la crème of crush-dom), manage to eat a whole lunch by your crush's side. Unfortunately, the title "crush" is apt as it is very easy to be crushed if you find out that (s)he does not return your affections. Don't be crushed by a crush! Instead, follow these tips for moving on and moving up to someone who deserves your special attention.

Defining a Crush

A crush, unlike a relationship, is not a two-way street. Often you'll realize that you feel a strong attraction to someone you barely know, for reasons you barely understand, and that this, in all of its glory, is a crush.

Signs of a Killer Crush

Even if you know better, falling hard for a crush can be unavoidable. Signs of a killer crush include:

  • Wanting to be near your crush, even if you don't know his/her name, and (s)he wouldn't know yours.
  • Wanting to find out as much as you can about your crush and searching for clues to "prove" your compatibility.
  • Changing your habits or schedules to coincide with those of your crush.
  • Feeling embarrassed or flustered when your crush pays attention to you.
  • Reacting nervously when you are physically close to your crush.
  • Obsessing for hours about a hypothetical future with your crush.

Coping with a Crush

Living with a crush isn't easy, in fact it's hard work. Having a crush makes it hard to concentrate, it makes it hard to eat and it especially makes it hard to sleep, even if you are hoping to meet up with your crush somewhere in your dreams. To make sure that the rest of your life doesn't fall apart for the duration of your crush,

  • Confess your crush to your friends and ask them to distract you.
  • Throw yourself into schoolwork to make sure you don't fall behind (and who knows, maybe by standing out you'll catch your crush's attention).
  • Take up a hobby that will get you out of the house and get you moving.
  • Give yourself enough time alone to fantasize about your crush, but don't let it interfere with your real life.
Living with a crush can be a wonderful, magical, painful, torturous time. Allow yourself to enjoy the frivolity of a crush, but don't let your feelings override your common sense. Don't risk your safety, or your reputation, in order to get your crush's attention, and forget about your true friends and relationships. In other words, don't irrevocably change your life for a crush that will likely disappear as quickly as it began. Ride it out, enjoy it, and let it die its natural death.

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Comments...

Tell him face to face How you feel. I'm 14 and told the girl that I think about all the time how I feel. We went out for a month but school drama ended the relationship. We still have feelings for each other and go on dates. But we haven't kissed. I have had my first kiss but just not with her. We have been best friends for a while and still are. It doesn't make your friendship awkward at all really unless another friend brings it up.
marc - 5 January 2012 @ 4:37 AM
Help, I'm a 14 year old girl, and I really like my male friend, he's really sweet and funny and he always makes me feel safe. The other day we hugged goodbye and I really wanted to kiss him passionately, he's so perfect. But I know he doesn't like me, eat should I do? Should I tell him or should I not, someone help, :(
Want my friend - 22 November 2011 @ 10:47 PM
I like this it gives good advice.
bambi - 10 June 2011 @ 10:18 AM
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